Legendary Origins
by EpicJDrolet
Summary: The Achievement Hunter lads tell the true story of the origin of the Tower of Pimps. For archival footage, or for something much more? T for swearing-nothing you wouldn't hear in an Achievement Hunter let's play, though. One-shot featuring Gavin Free, Ray Narvaez Jr., Geoff Ramsey, Jack Patillo and Michael Jones of Rooster Teeth.


A camera flicked on, with the word 'RECORD' appearing beside a small red dot in the top right corner of the screen. As it disappeared, someone started to talk. "People often ask us 'how did you come up with the Tower of Pimps?', and we had the same answer-'go watch Let's Play Minecraft – Part 2'." a tired, gravelly voice stopped talking. His name was Geoff Lazer Ramsey. In-game, he looked like the Halo character 'Master Chief'-a full body, green, MJOLNIR Mark IV armour with an orange-tinted visor that hid his face.

A second voice started to talk. This one was perkier than Geoff's and had a British Accent. His name was Gavin Free. "This video should _never _reach the public, and should only be used as an archival footage." He spoke sternly and calm, sounding ominous. "Because this, is the true story."

"Hello everyone! This is Achievement Hunter's Let's Play Minecraft Part 2" Gavin said cheerily. Other voices-Geoff Ramsey, Michael Jones, Jack Patillo and Ray Narvaez Jr.-all chimed in, saying random words in the background. "What are we doing, Geoff?"

Geoff's character looked around. The sky was dark, clouded over with storm clouds-the sound of thunder in the far distance. "Today, we're going to go to the Nether for all of our first times (except Gavin)." He turned to Ray. Ray's skin was a modified version of the basic 'Steve' skin-wearing a tuxedo instead of his blue t-shirt and pants combo. He called this skin 'Tuxedo Mask', named after the Sailor Moon protagonist of the same name. Like Tuxedo Mask, he carried roses-although he oddly had a hatred of cake, as if it were his Kryptonite.

Ray looked at Geoff. He was carrying a stone sword. "We need to light it first. I don't have any flint." As he finished speaking Geoff looked down, and pulled a flint out of his pocket. He threw it at Ray, who caught it an inch away from his face. "Thanks."

A second later, Ray, Geoff, Gavin, Michael and Jack stood on the roof of Ray's house, around the Nether Portal. "Wait. Before we go, does anybody have to go to the washroom?" Jack joked, as Ray lit it.

"So. Who's first?" Geoff asked, turning towards Michael. Michael's skin was based off of Banjo from Banjo-Kazooie. A brown bear with a peach-coloured stomach. He wore yellow shorts and a blue backpack, which Banjo's best friend, Kazooie, would live in... if this was the Banjo-Kazooie series.

Michael looked around, the four other Achievement Hunters looking at Michael, all thinking the same thing. "Wh-why are you looking at me?" he said, quickly looking around. His face went cold at the reason of his sudden popularity. "You want me to go first? Okay." He quickly jumped into the portal, and disappeared a second later-leaving a giggling Geoff behind. The four others stood around the portal, waiting. "Okay," Michael started, sounding calm, "It's safe."

Even though Michael gave them the okay sign, they still waited. It only took a few more seconds before their hopes were fulfilled. "God dammit!" Michael yelled, the little back bar appearing in the bottom left corner, reading 'MLP Michael blew up.' This earned a chorus of laughter from the others. "Fuck you." he yelled, climbing back onto the roof of the house.

Gavin smiled. His skin was a human (or Minecraft man)-shaped Creeper. Green, dark green and white spots covering his body, with a stone cold face. "Okay, seriously now." he said, jumping into the portal. He was quickly followed by Geoff and Jack. Ray and Michael stayed behind, waiting for something.

After about seven seconds of being in the Nether, Gavin yelped, and another black bar appeared in the corner of the screen-'GavinoFree blew up'. "Well, there goes my diamonds." he said, approaching the portal again.

Ray, who was smirking, freaked out at that statement. "You stole my diamonds!?" he yelled, punching Gavin in-game. Geoff laughed at the statement, and Michael tried to say something, but his voice was blocked by his co-workers.

Gavin hopped back into the portal, with only a stack of 64 Cobblestone in his pocket. He was quickly followed by Ray and Michael.

As the group trekked through the Nether, each carrying a sword-either wooden or stone, although Ray, who owned the server, had a diamond one-they often jumped, or cobbled, over pools of lava, and got burned by one of the many wildfires that naturally spawn in the hell-like dimension. "Where are we going?" Jack finally asked, breaking the silence which had quickly settled in. His skin was based off the biker from Trials-a green and white shirt, black pants, and a blue helmet obscuring his face.

Geoff turned around, but kept walking. "We're going to find a Nether Fortress. Fight some Blazes, some Magma Cubes, and maybe..." his voice cut off by the louder, and more alarming, voice of Ray.

"GHAST!" he yelled, hurting everyone's ears. The Achievement Hunters grabbed their swords, Michael grabbing a bow and immediately readying an arrow. They turned to the Ghast, whose eyes opened as he turned to face them. A fireball-or Flame Charge, as the item was-flew out of it's mouth at the group. "RUN!" Ray yelled, as the fireball slammed into the Netherrack behind them, destroying the ground and revealing a pit of lava below.

Michael aimed steadily and shot an arrow, hitting the Ghast directly between the eyes. As it connected, the jellyfish-like creature stopped and it's gaze focused on Michael. He lowered his bow, as the Ghast's eyes turned red. "Oh shit." he said. As a fireball left the creature's mouth, the bear started running away quickly, this time yelling. "OH SHIT!"

As Michael ran, he saw a small cobblestone box out of the corner of his eye, and turned to look at it. It was missing four blocks-probably an entrance. Jack leaned out of the hole, waving. "C'mon!" he yelled. Michael followed his advice, quickly sprinting towards the small shack, dodging Ghast fireballs and fires along the way. He dived through the small opening, huddling in the dark hut.

"Anyone got four blocks?" Geoff yelled, scared. As if on cue, Blazes rose up around the hut, their heavy metallic breathing echoing off the cobblestone walls. Gavin looked to the left, with an almost guilty expression on his face. "Gavin?" Geoff said, blaming him for something. As he spoke, everyone's gazes shifted towards the Creeper man.

He placed four gold blocks in a vertical row, covering up the hole. "Tower of Pimps!" he yelled, placing the final block, followed by "Woo hoo!" and a glare from Ray.

"Not only did you steal my diamonds, but you stole **all of my gold **too!?" he punched Gavin several more times, dropping his health. This earned a chuckle from the other Hunters, obviously ignoring the anger on the Puerto Rican's face. If he was an anime or manga character, he would have the angry, childish face with the vein on his forehead, with a smoke cloud above his head.

Gavin chuckled, his face resembling that of the famous internet meme: the Trollface. "Thirty-six gold ingots." he said, proudly. "All of the ingots in your chest."

Ray punched Gavin multiple times, again, in the game. Gavin's in-game avatar losing all ten hearts at one time. "Fudgey Nibblets!" Gavin yelled, as the death screen appeared.

Michael laughed loudly. "Well. Gavin's dead." he said, gasping for air.

As Geoff and Jack looked at each other, the mechanical breathing of the Blazes grew louder, and the walls around them starting to catch fire. "Foo-fuh-fah-fuck!" Geoff said, attacking fires that started to lunge out and attempt to grab him. Geoff glanced around and noticed the others doing the same, while Gavin still sat at the death screen, his... gubbins still lying on the ground.

Above them, a group of cobblestone blocks blew apart, and Wither Skeletons jumped into the small shack. "RUN AWAY!" Jack yelled, breaking a hole in the wall to escape, Wither Skeletons on his heels. As the wall was destroyed, Skeletons and Blazes surrounded it. "RUN A DIFFERENT WAY!" he yelled, turning to face a Wither Skeleton face-to-face.

Quickly, the Achievement Hunters were overtaken. Michael died next, and respawned alongside Gavin-both stranded on a beach... in the middle of the night. "Moguar's down!" he yelled, clicking 'leave game'.

Jack died next, his gubbins spilling everywhere, mixing in with Michael's and Gavin's. "God dammit!" he yelled, as the wither effect pained him to death.

Ray and Geoff stood back-to-back, holding out their swords-a stone and a diamond variant for Geoff and Ray, respectively-pointing them at their enemies. Ray quickly broke a hole in the wall, and motioned for Geoff to run out, who did, but was quickly flanked by Magma Cubes, allowing Blazes to fly in and attacking. Ray jumped up to protect his boss, smiling as he did. He attacked a Blaze, and sent it into a Ghast's fireball, exploding. Before he realized, he was the only person left alive, all the other Achievement Hunters yelling encouraging words at him. A second Ghast quickly flew overhead, staring down, and an army of Zombie Pigman and Skeletons-both the Overworld and Wither variants-marching toward him.

The world seemed to freeze as Ray made his final stand. Standing with his diamond sword in both hands, pointing it towards the army of mobs marching towards him. Anger flashed on Ray's face, a head of rose petals reflecting off his eyes. Far off in the distance, the cries of a Wither echoed off the walls of Netherrack around him. "With a bit of elbow grease-and headlight fluid-anything's possible." he said, referencing Rooster Teeth's-Achievement Hunter's parent company-famous Red vs. Blue series.

All at once the world started up again, and a loud explosion rocked the entire Minecraft world. He turned back, the entire cobblestone building was destroyed, with the exception of the four gold blocks. The Tower of Pimps.

As skeletons started to fire at him, Ray hid behind the tower, to evade the arrows. He heard the mechanical breathing of the Blazes again, echoing through his skull. A skeleton shot, and the arrow aimed directly at Ray's face. He ducked, and closed his eyes, the Wither flying above, screeching.

He opened his eyes. He stood on a long pillar in the middle of a crater. Him, on top of the tower, with only a Wither above him. Ray jumped, cheers from his onlooking coworkers blocked out by the excitement in his skull.

He jumped, swinging his sword madly as he did...

Then, he opened his eyes.


End file.
